Entitled cousin-in-law pressures married couple to front the bill for her 4-day stay at the couple's home, including transportation and countless meals out: ‘I never even heard a thank you’

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  • "I'm not the host of expense-free vacations...'
  • "AITAH for refusing to cater to relative-in-law’s expense-free vacation?"

    I am now "the a hole" in my wife's family, but am I...? I feel justified, am I?
  • My opinion: I don't think anyone should ever invite themselves to stay at someone else's home. You only stay if you are invited, and then if you stay, you bring gifts and pay for meals etc.
  • The story: Over the course of our 30 year marriage we have hosted many family members at our house. Recently my wife's
  • cousin contacted her and said she would like to come out at visit the family. My wife's mother and sisters live nearby. (The three of them always buy my wife into getting their ways).
  • My wife and her sisters work, whereas I just retired so I'm elected to pick the cousin up at the airport.
  • I've never met or seen pictures of this person, so I'm told to hold a sign like a chauffeur. On the way
  • home the cousin said she was starving as asked if we could get something to eat. We stopped at a nearby restaurant and ordered food. I ended up
  • paying the bill and thought it was strange she didn't offer to help, but ok, maybe she'll contribute later.
  • Every following breakfast, lunch, and dinner was paid for by me. Even at the family picnic where everyone was chipping in money, she didn't contribute a thing. Her
  • entire 4 night stay was free! I never even heard a Thank You. And I drove her to and from the airport and everywhere she wanted to go while she was here.
  • woman looking slyly at the camera as her in-law drives her around in a car for free
  • A few days later this cousin's sister emailed my wife and said they heard all about her sisters trip and how much fun she had. So now, that cousin,
  • and her other two sisters, want to bring their mother for a surprise visit for my mother-in-law. (that's 4 more strangers who just invited themselves to my house).
  • I lost it as said "NO WAY!, They can stay in a hotel!"
  • If they were close family I would have no problem with this but I have never met them and my wife hasn't seen them since childhood except for at a reunion 20 years ago.
  • AND, a close cousin told us - that branch of their family is known for being mooches.
  • My wife feels like she's caught in the middle. I told her she can tell them that I'm being an a hle and I insist they get a rental car and stay in a hotel. My
  • wife's sisters live together in a small condo so they cannot host and they don't see a problem with us hosting since we have a house. They said they would contribute money towards food, but to me it's more than that.
  • Four more people I have never met, invited themselves to stay in my house and expect me to chauffeur them wherever they want? NO WAY!, Get a rental car and stay in a hotel!!!!
  • I'm not the host of expense-free vacations... I lost... The sisters - always get their way. So now this is where I've become the ah le to my wife's family....
  • - I'm taking the dog and going camping while four strangers invade my home. I truly feel violated. Next time I hear the term "We don't want to put you out" I will think of this! YES, YOU ARE LITERALLY PUTTING ME OUT!
  • Am I justified in my " s- holyness"? Or should I dedicate a week of my time to entertain, cater to, and pay for a group of strangers that I will never see again?
  • lataa ted25 You wife choose estranged family over you? YNTA, but your wife and family surely are.
  • Vast-Fortune-1583 NTA: You have a wife problem. I'm very petty. I'd stay home and make them miserable. But that's just me. I would drive them anywhere. I wouldn't buy them food. Nothing.

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